A Complete History of My Sexual Failures (2008)

Director
Chris Waitt

Main cast
Chris Waitt

Genres
Documentary, Romance, Foreign

Description
The egocentric documentary-maker Chris Waitt traces his romantic ineptitude and sexual impotence through awkward interviews with irate ex-girlfriends and stunts involving S&M parlours, Harley Street doctors and Viagra overdoses. The results are often hilarious, sometimes moving and speak directly to the hapless paramour in all of us.


Similar movies

When Dean a young detective, falls for a woman who seems to appear only in his dreams. When Dean discovers his amour is the real-life daughter of a Dr. Jang and that the been trapped in a time warp, he journeys back in time to save her. But first he must fend off a few hordes of superhuman swordsmen.
When nothing is sacred, everything is funny. More reality TV shows the networks wouldn't dare air from the warped minds at National Lampoon.
Like a warped fun-house mirror, the song-poem industry has run parallel to the mainstream music business for close to a century; it's estimated that over 200,000 song-poems have been recorded since 1900. The genre's durability can be traced to three of our deepest American desires - to be in show business, to get rich quick, and to share and express our deepest feelings. We meet several of the "songwriters" - from an elderly woman to a young African-American man to a small-town Iowan with big-time dreams - each of whom has been in the "business" for awhile, churning out odd compositions that cover the waterfront of American obsessions, from Jesus to genitalia, from politics to Elvis. We also meet the producers (often known as song-sharks) who hold out the tantalizing promise of fame to their eager customers, and the has-been musicians who sit in studios, day after day and year after year...
The shape-shifting and enigmatic hip hop artist Kool Keith has managed to surprise, shock, and enrage fans and detractors alike with virtually every album he has released. His many personas include Dr. Octagon, under which he released 1996's DR. OCTAGONOCOLOGIST, a futuristic masterpiece that flouted traditional hip hop mores in favor of intriguingly disruptive, warped rhymes. He is also the Black Elvis, Dr. Doom, Mr. Gerbik, and Rhythm X, and is formerly of the Bronx group the Ultramagnetic MCs, with whom he first established himself as a rapper who pushes the envelope and is not afraid to be critical of the system within which he operates. This DVD release features multiple interviews with the artist, as well as live concert footage. Keith takes his audiences on a tour of Manhattan and the Bronx. Keith also explains why he loves seltzer water.
A chilling reminder of the dangerous world we live in, this riveting documentary reveals the innermost workings of some of the most warped minds in recent history. From the violent shooting spree in a San Ysidro MacDonald's restaurant to the assassination attempt on Ronald Reagan to the predations of serial murderer Henry Lee Lucas, see the pattern of violence as it extends in our culture and society.
When "Star Trek" first aired in 1966, it expanded the viewers' imaginations about what was possible in their lifetimes. Today, many of the space-age technologies displayed on the show, like space shuttles, cell phones, and desktop computers, have already gone from science fiction to science fact. Other innovations, like warp drive, teleportation, and medical tricorders are actively in development. Join us as we celebrate the 50th Anniversary of "Star Trek" - a show that continues to inform, enrich, and inspire.
The science of Christopher Nolan's sci-fi, Interstellar.
With more than 300 hours of film shot during the 2010 Tour, 'No Room for Rockstars' documents the true stories of modern era rock and roll . From the kids traveling cross country in a van playing parking lots to gain notice, to the veteran stage manager whose life was saved by the Tour, to the musician who crosses over to mainstream success while on the road.
One of the most ambitious and exciting theories ever proposed—one that may be the long-sought "theory of everything," which eluded even Einstein—gets a masterful, lavishly computer-animated explanation from bestselling author-physicist Brian Greene, when NOVA presents the nuts, bolts, and sometimes outright nuttiness of string theory.
About Performance Art and its historical origins including its links with folk customs. The film includes extracts from the work of many different performance artists from England and abroad collected from 1979 to 1983, amongst them: Tibor Hajas (Hungary), Rasa Todosijevic (Yugoslavia), Iain Robertson (Scotland), Zbigniew Warpechowski (Poland), Milan Knizak (Czechoslovakia), Natalia LL (Poland), Ewa Partum (Poland), Jan Mlcoch (Czechoslovakia), Sonia Knox (Northern Ireland), Jerzy Beres (Poland) and Stuart Brisley (England). The film also records the Haxey Hood and Padstow Hobbyhorse folk dances from Lincolnshire and Cornwall respectively.
French filmmaker Claude Miller's This Sweet Sickness is based on a suspense novel by Patricia Highsmith, of Strangers on a Train fame. In the original, the murder-protagonist was a psychotic, pure and simple (if such words are appropriate here!) In Miller's version, the "hero," David, is a pathetic creature, motivated by humiliation and sexual inadequacy; thus the emphasis is not on his heinous crimes but on his warped personality. The director's noirish decision to stage much of the action in the dark, or the rain, or both, is a function of David's deep depression. As in his other films, Miller uses water as an omen of evil; you've seldom seen a more foreboding swimming pool than the one in This Sweet Sickness. The film was originally released as Dites-lui que je l'aime.
Corey (Fred Savage) refuses to let his emotionally disturbed younger brother Jimmy (Luke Edwards) be institutionalized, and the two run away together. They soon join forces with a resourceful girl (Jenny Lewis), who notices that Jimmy has a special talent: he is a "wizard" at video games and can achieve the high score on absolutely everything he plays. Evading their parents and a sinister bounty hunter, the trio head for a climactic showdown at the national video game championships in California.
A group of students from the Cosmo Academy are about to take their final exam: surviving for over fifty days in a derelict ship. But when they arrive, they discover that instead of ten students, there are eleven. One of them doesn't belong there...
Alex's dreary life is reignited when he meets Rachel, the woman of his dreams. The only thing that stands in the way of their perfect, serendipitous relationship is that Rachel has recently passed away.
The Brothers Bloom are the best con men in the world, swindling millionaires with complex scenarios of lust and intrigue. Now they've decided to take on one last job - showing a beautiful and eccentric heiress the time of her life with a romantic adventure that takes them around the world.
Raj Mathur alias Raju lives in picturesque Darjeeling, is a devout Hindu, likes praying to Bhagwan Shri Shiv, studies Engineering, and wants to become rich - at warp speed. He does well in his studies, re-locates to Bombay, where he hopes to live temporarily with one Ram Mohan. Unfortunately, Raju is unable to locate Ram, but the friendly slum dwellers take care of him, feed him, and house him. He meets and falls in love with Renu, and it is she who gets him a job at Chhabria Builders where she works as a Receptionist. Thereafter there is no stopping Raju, as he climbs the ladder of success, and soon not only becomes the Chief Engineer but also finds a place in the heart of the Senior Partner's daughter, Sapna Chhabria.
Warpath is a 1951 film directed by Byron Haskin. It stars Edmond O'Brien, Polly Bergen and Dean Jagger. John Vickers has spent eight years hunting for the three men who murdered the woman he loved. He finds one, Woodson, and kills him in a gunfight, but not before learning that the other two men have joined the U.S. Cavalry.
Four young offenders and their workers spend a weekend in the remote Yorkshire village of Mortlake, which prides on keeping itself to itself. A minor incident with locals rapidly escalates into a blood-soaked, deliriously warped nightmare.
In the year 2220 A.D., the Earth Federation launches a plan to evacuate Earth when discovering that a travelling black hole capable of destroying anything in its path is on course towards the solar system. As the people on Earth prepare to relocate to planet Amare, whose ruler offers refuge, the tyrants known as the "S.U.S. Empire" attack the first Earth evacuation fleet. After learning that his wife Capt. Yuki Mori-Kodai disappeared in the battle and that legendary space battleship Yamato has been fully rebuilt, Susumu Kodai accepts command of the ship as he intends to not only help humanity once again, but also find Yuki in the hope of helping his relationship with his daughter Miyuki, who puts the blame on him for her mother's disappearance. But in order to fullfil the mission, the Yamato must go through battles against the SUS Empire, who intend to spoil humanity's hopes of finding a new place to live in and turn Earth into energy for their own selfish needs.
In 2199, five years after the Gamilons began an invasion of Earth, the planet has been ravaged by the aliens' bombs. The remnants of humanity have fled underground to escape the irradiated surface. One day, former pilot Susumu Kodai discovers a capsule sent from the planet Iscandar that tells of a device that can remove the radiation from the Earth's surface. The Earth Defense Force rebuilds the battleship Yamato with a new type of propulsion system to make the 148,000 light year trip to Iscandar in hopes of saving the Earth. Within one year, the radiation will drive the rest of humanity to extinction.
When the crew of the Enterprise is called back home, they find an unstoppable force of terror from within their own organization has detonated the fleet and everything it stands for, leaving our world in a state of crisis. With a personal score to settle, Captain Kirk leads a manhunt to a war-zone world to capture a one man weapon of mass destruction. As our heroes are propelled into an epic chess game of life and death, love will be challenged, friendships will be torn apart, and sacrifices must be made for the only family Kirk has left: his crew.
To infinity and beyond! Buzz Lightyear, everyone's favorite Space Ranger from the Academy Award-winning Toy Story movies, is here with an exciting interstellar space adventure all his own. Joined by Star Command team members Mira Nova, the psychic princess, bumbling newbie Booster and XR, the experimental robot, Buzz defends the planet of the Little Green Men against the devious plots of the evil Emperor Zurg.
The Borg, a relentless race of cyborgs, are on a direct course for Earth. Violating orders to stay away from the battle, Captain Picard and the crew of the newly-commissioned USS Enterprise E pursue the Borg back in time to prevent the invaders from changing Federation history and assimilating the galaxy.
On his latest expedition, Dr. Rick Marshall is sucked into a space-time vortex alongside his research assistant and a redneck survivalist. In this alternate universe, the trio make friends with a primate named Chaka, their only ally in a world full of dinosaurs and other fantastic creatures.
The Apaches are on the warpath and the Army must defend them. Murphy's mission is to get a shipment of rifles, but it's stolen by greedy white traders with the help of mutinous soldiers
Revolting mutants hunt human outcasts and underground fighters (Bruce Campbell, Marta Alicia) in a future world of mind control.
A simple stagecoach trip is complicated by the fact that Geronimo is on the warpath in the area. The passengers on the coach include a a drunken doctor, two women, a bank manager who has taken off with his client's money, and the famous Ringo Kid, among others.
A man and his daughter are attacked in the woods by what they believe is a Bigfoot-type creature. However, they soon begin to suspect that they may have stumbled onto a nest of aliens in a hidden spacecraft.
The fate of the galaxy rests in the hands of bitter rivals. One, James Kirk, is a delinquent, thrill-seeking Iowa farm boy. The other, Spock, a Vulcan, was raised in a logic-based society that rejects all emotion. As fiery instinct clashes with calm reason, their unlikely but powerful partnership is the only thing capable of leading their crew through unimaginable danger, boldly going where no one has gone before. The human adventure has begun again.
The year is 2306… 12 years ago, Captain Kirk was swept away by the Nexus. One year later, Commander Scott was reported missing along with the USS Jenolen. The remaining USS Enterprise crew have split. Captain Spock and Doctor McCoy are on Khitomer, continuing their work towards peace the Klingon Empire. Captain Sulu and the Excelsior are on a mission beyond the Alpha Quadrant. Captain Chekov, feels his career has stalled, leaving him to ponder retirement. Captain Uhura, Director of Starfleet Linguistics, feels there may be something missing in her life.Now, Chekov and Uhura, with John Harriman, former Captain of the Enterprise-B, come together for the dedication of a new ship. However, their reunion is cut short when they receive a distress call from an all-too-familiar planet, where they meet up with an almost-forgotten face, and in an instant, something happens that presses the three friends to embark on a mission that will forever change their lives…
A dark, twisted retelling of "Dante's Inferno," done in the torture-porn style of "Hostel" and "High Tension." To escape her abusive foster home, headstrong 18-year-old Danielle Hitches a Ride with an affable psycho who calls himself Virgil and has an axe to grind against women based on his warped religious beliefs. She realizes she hasn't quite found her knight in shining armor when she awakens half-naked, chained to a post in Virgil's basement. As Virgil, puts Danielle through a sadistic "moral cleansing" of debauched torture sessions that could kill her at any moment, she must choose either to fight back or to become as inhuman and deranged as Virgil himself. What Virgil doesn't know is that Danielle may be more than up to the challenge of his psychotic head games.
A wife, her two-timing husband and a flirting neighbor are unpredictable competitors in a warped game that turns into a life-or-death affair.
Having defeated the Joker, Batman now faces the Penguin - a warped and deformed individual who is intent on being accepted into Gotham society. Crooked businessman Max Schreck is coerced into helping him become Mayor of Gotham and they both attempt to expose Batman in a different light. Selina Kyle, Max's secretary, is thrown from the top of a building and is transformed into Catwoman - a mysterious figure who has the same personality disorder as Batman. Batman must attempt to clear his name, all the time deciding just what must be done with the Catwoman.
Three friends struggle to maintain their hedonistic lifestyles as they approach 30. Delving into their story, we become subjected to their inane theories, absurd philosophies and warped sense of humor.
Newly-minted teacher Karla stands before her first class of students filled with vigour, idealism and, yes, the requisite measure of naiveté. She doesn’t want to teach a curriculum, she wants to teach the skill of learning; to train her students to be honest, thoughtful, critical people. She soon notices how warped and opportunistic her secondary pupils are. Karla rouses them, challenges them, pulls them out of their shell. And she does it successfully. Although the teachers’ collective regards her with suspicion, she enjoys the support of school director Ali Hirte. Her new beau, Kaspar, has been burned once and is sceptical of her zeal. It looks like he might turn out to be right; over time, Karla becomes domesticated. But she is not the sort to be written off quite so easily... (Berlinale 2016 programme notes)
A successful businessman whose destiny leads him to a secluded Swiss chalet where his life is put on trial by a group of retired law professionals. The men assemble to analyze Sordi's rise to power and his increasingly immoral behavior as he attained success, and the warped perceptions of right and wrong he has adopted to remain successful.
A filmmaker is upset to find out that his wholesome script about an orphan and his dog has been warped into a film about ... strippers?!!
In dreamlike mountain scenery, Toshiko makes a daring escape from her sexually warped Uncle Sonezaki. Fortunately, she met Samehada as she runs for her life, which is also escaping from some slayers. What follows is a wild chase that leads the audience into a comically violent world.
As a ramp and commercial model and a swinging teenager in this movie of sex,wealth and power, Assunta de Rossi as Erika is a sexy appealing face on billboards and on the catwalk but,at home, with her sister Loida, she shares a dark secret with her surrogate father,Mr. Lorenzo Lavares, who is wed to her sister. The house of Lavares features a strange quartet father and son married to the sisters with warped emotions and shocking happenings.
A warped woman takes deadly measures to help a new roommate get rid of her problems.
Dreaded serial killer Peter Kurten voluntarily turns himself over to the authorities. A young lawyer, eager to prove Kurten's mental derangement, agrees to defend a man who terrorized Germany between 1929 and 1931. In studying the case and meeting with the intelligent, cold-blooded manipulator, the young idealist's values become warped.
With a simple “Hello, everybody,” television writer and stand-up comedian Louis C.K. opens his latest live show, Hilarious. This harmless salutation is the least-controversial thing that comes out of Louis C.K.’s mouth as he turns rants on everyday subjects (impatient people, his weight, fatherhood) into hilarious, expletive-laden diatribes where nothing is sacred—not even (gasp!) his children. Who else can name-check Ray Charles and Adolph Hitler in the same breath and elicit a chorus of raucous laughter? Louis C.K. says what’s on his mind, even at the risk of offending, but his “I don’t give a f**k” attitude makes his irreverent brand of humor especially endearing and relatable. His self-deprecating style elevates his filmed live show to a form of therapy, where we, too, can get comic relief from some pretty warped subjects. At one point, Louis C.K. asks, “Where do you draw the line?” With him, there is no line.
Lex Luthor enacts his plan to rid the world of Superman, once and for all. Succeeding with solar radiation poisoning, the Man of Steel is slowly dying. With what little times remains, the Last Son of Krypton must confront the revealing of his secret identity to Lois Lane and face Luthor in a final battle.
Tom, a young advertising copywriter, travels to the country for a funeral. There, he’s shocked to find out no one knows who he is, nor who he was to the deceased, whose brother soon sets the rules of a twisted game. In order to protect the family’s name and grieving mother, Tom now has to play the peacekeeper in a household whose obscure past bodes even greater darkness for his “trip” to the farm. Long ways, long lies... Set in Quebec’s rural panorama, this psychological thriller centres on the ever-growing gap between city and country and the oppositive nature of men who live there. Stockholm syndrome, deception, grief and secretive savageries pervade this brief and brutal pilgrimage through the warped and ugly truth
The story centers on a group of strangers trapped in a time warp house where a terrible event transpired exactly 100 years prior.
Four athletically able teenagers along with their brainy friend Billy are selected by Zordon to fight the evil of Rita Repulsa, her monsters and her minions after the witch is accidentally released from imprisonment in an intergalactic dumpster on the moon. Later in the series, the rangers are joined by Tommy, the once evil Green Ranger designed for Rita's evil, but later was deprogrammed and spent two portions of the series briefly as the Green Ranger. Over time, some rangers had to pass their powers to others as well. Action scenes and scenes with Rita were edited from footage based on Japanese action sagas. Replacement villain Lord Zedd was designed in the U.S.
In this cult classic, sweethearts Brad (Barry Bostwick) and Janet (Susan Sarandon), stuck with a flat tire during a storm, discover the eerie mansion of Dr. Frank-N-Furter (Tim Curry), a transvestite scientist. As their innocence is lost, Brad and Janet meet a houseful of wild characters, including a rocking biker (Meat Loaf) and a creepy butler (Richard O'Brien). Through elaborate dances and rock songs, Frank-N-Furter unveils his latest creation: a muscular man named "Rocky."
Four astronauts returning from mankind's first mission to Mars enter a time warp and crash on a 26th Century Earth devastated by atomic war. Our heroes meet with hideous mutant cavemen, giant spiders, love-struck beauties in short dresses, and jealous old geezers in sparkly skullcaps as they struggle to save humanity and build a new world.
A psychic investigates the disappearance of a space-shuttle crew and discovers an alien force present in the craft.
An astronaut comes home to his family, only now he's invisible and one year in the future.
A young boy in the woods discovers a lovable alien...or is it? One of the Mystery Science Theater 3000 faves. A little boy who has an extensive array of pets he likes to call "specimens" finds an alien egg to hatch, somewhat like Horton. The creature manages to use his snout to suck up peanuts and warp time and space with his fingers. Unfortunately, his brother who is found by poachers go on a killing spree.
1615. Ninja Sarutobi Sasuke is assigned the task of finding a hidden treasure that will restore his clan to their full power. However, sexy ninja warrior Kagero stands in Sasuke's way. Complications ensue when a sudden time warp occurs and both Sasuke and Kagero find themselves thrust hundreds of years into the future to Tokyo, Japan in 1984.
In a far-future time ruled by the supernatural, a young girl requests the help of a vampire hunter to kill the vampire who has bitten her and thus prevent her from becoming a vampire herself.
Hoping to prevent his brother's Vietnam death and to prevent the JFK assassination, a time-traveling college professor goes back to the '60s but can't find his way out. Trapped in a time warp, he can't effect a change because he can't return to his present time
Johan and Tina are cadet scientists at a science centre. Johan claims that he invented a laser disposal machine which actually is Tinas brainchild. Tina request Amir, an astronomer, to help her prevent Johan from using the machine. Amir and Tina sneaks into the centre to destroy the machine but are obstructed by Johan and Shima. The self-operating machine emits a laser beam onto them and they are transferred into a time warp to the Malacca Sultanate. They witness the conflict between Hang Tuah and Hang Jebat. Amir tries to alter history by preventing Hang Tuah from killing Hang Jebat, but he fails to do so.
While searching for a way out of the woods, a group of lost friends stumble upon Camp Hiawatha and take up with the teens who are bunking there. But the party's over when they discover that this camp is literally stuck in a time warp -- 1981, to be exact -- and that they're living the same horrible day over and over. Can they escape the wrath of a killer who's silently stalking the campers and their terrified counselors?
SEXCULA is a skin flick of legendary lost status. Shot in Vancouver, British Columbia, it was screened once before disappearing and sought after by cult aficionados for decades. Now, Impulse Pictures is proud to bring you the world premiere of SEXCULA. Sex film fans can finally get a look at this elusive crazy Canadian erotic/horror hybrid for the first time ever. Starring a Marilyn Chambers lookalike in dual roles as Countess Sexcula, a buxom cutie with no qualms about lying nude on a table for the entire movie, and a horny bride who can’t wait for her ring. The nudity and sex are delivered nonstop in this campy horror romp. Watch in amazement at the naked picnic, the “girl-on-gorilla” strip tease, and stare in awe as a female pleasure-robot puts the plot into a time warp!
A straitlaced, square couple, seeking shelter from a storm, find themselves in the castle of a transsexual alien mad scientist intent on creating a buff bodybuilder.
Admiral Kirk and his bridge crew risk their careers stealing the decommissioned Enterprise to return to the restricted Genesis planet to recover Spock's body.
Time travelers from the 23rd century return to 1992 to warn Japan that Godzilla will cause a catastrophic nuclear incident in the 21st century and suggest a way to rid the world of him forever. They intend to go back to 1944, to Ragos Island, where a dinosaur was exposed to radiation from the Bikini H-Bomb test and became Godzilla. Upon completion of this task, King Gidorâ appears in 1992 and the visitors' true plan is discovered. They wish to destroy Japan so it will not become the dominant economic force. Luckily for the Japanese, Godzilla was still created and will now fight Gidorâ.

© Valossa 2015–2024